The Andy Richter seat

I got room at the Hotel Posadas and there wasnt really much left to until the next day. I asked the lady at the hotel's front desk where the border was and she said it was only 4 blocks away. I figured I would walk there to just take a peek, and stop somewhere for some ice cream. The walk was quick and I did find some ice cream so I was supper happy. I got durazno flavor (peach ice cream, what was I thinking).
When I made it back to the hotel, two girls had just checked in the room next to mine. One was an English diving instructor who lived in the Bermudas. The other, Cindy, was an Oklahoma State graduate (go sooners ?!?) from Florida who had followed her boyfriend all the way to Sunnyvale, California, where she taught ESL to Indian and Japanese computer programmers. They invited me to go have stake with them. I said I'd tag along but would eat, since I had already dined my share of durazno ice cream (in hindesite, it was delicious)
Diner was very pleasant. The girls were cool and made interesting conversation. I was fixated on Cindy's mouth, as she had the most beautiful lips. She was an all right girl that didn't exactly stand out, but she had superstar lips. I really wanted to kiss her. The English girl, however, quickly caught on to my intentions and became overprotective of Cindy, throwing mad salt on my game.
I didnt mind, it is not as though I have to kiss every girl I came across during my trip. They ate and when they were done, the waiter came and asked if I wasnt going to eat anything, so I replied.
"Yo soy el guarda espaldas de las senoritas !!", implying I was only there to accompany them. Just as the waiter stopped laughing (more out of politeness then anything else), I heard Cindy ask what guarda espaldas meant.
I said it meant I was their bodyguard. As I looked away, she looked to the Brith and wispered
"You can guard my back any time"
I thought I may get that kiss after all.
We began to talk about our travel experiences and they asked me what I thought of the Andy Richter reserved spot. I had no idea what they were talking about.
"You know who Andy Richter is, right?"
"Yeah", I said. "Conan O'Brien's sidekick"
"Right, the blonde chubby guy with the goldie locks."
"Did you ever notice how, on the buses, there is alway a little chubby blonde kid with a cooler ?"
"Yeah", I said, it is for the terere.
Right, and where does he seat at?
next to the driver.
And what happens if a passenger gets on the bus?
He moves one seat over.
Where does Andy Richter seat?
Next to Conan, I replied
And what happens when a guest comes on?
He moves one seat over.
And it all made sense, I thought it was funny the the whole terere issue had been a reference for two travelers (them the Swiss girls at the bus station).
We made it back to the hotel and I thought it was time for that kiss.
They asked me what I was up to the next day and I said I was off to Paraguay to check the Jesuite Reductions. I said they were welcome to come along if they wanted. I said I would come and knock at their door at 8 in the morning.
Okay, replied the Brit. We will come knock at your door if we wake up earlier than that.
We will get to check out each other's rooms, said Cindy.
That was the line I was waiting for...
You can check out my room right now, not much to see but you are welcome to see it if you want, I said.
Before I could even finish my invite, the British girl interrupted me "No one is checking no one's room". She pulled Cindy into their room and what was the end of.
Way to #@*& block me...